Ramona Blue

Book 49 of my 2018 Reading Challenge

Ramona Blue by Julie Murphy

Summary (via Goodreads)
Ramona was only five years old when Hurricane Katrina changed her life forever.
Since then, it’s been Ramona and her family against the world. Standing over six feet tall with unmistakable blue hair, Ramona is sure of three things: she likes girls, she’s fiercely devoted to her family, and she knows she’s destined for something bigger than the trailer she calls home in Eulogy, Mississippi. But juggling multiple jobs, her flaky mom, and her well-meaning but ineffectual dad forces her to be the adult of the family. Now, with her sister, Hattie, pregnant, responsibility weighs more heavily than ever.
The return of her childhood friend Freddie brings a welcome distraction. Ramona’s friendship with the former competitive swimmer picks up exactly where it left off, and soon he’s talked her into joining him for laps at the pool. But as Ramona falls in love with swimming, her feelings for Freddie begin to shift too, which is the last thing she expected. With her growing affection for Freddie making her question her sexual identity, Ramona begins to wonder if perhaps she likes girls and guys or if this new attraction is just a fluke. Either way, Ramona will discover that, for her, life and love are more fluid than they seem.

My Opinion
I was a little familiar with the controversy around the subject matter before reading this book.  As stated in the book summary, Ramona has identified as a lesbian but reconnecting with her friend Freddie and being attracted to him makes her question that.  I'm not in any of those demographics (39 and straight) so I'm not going to tell someone else how to feel but what I will say after reading the book is that the characters do touch on the confusion and she feels hesitant to even voice anything because her mom was convinced from the beginning it was a phase and she doesn't want to give her any "hope" at all because she is still attracted to girls as well.  Again, not my experience, but I do think this could be the path someone that is bi-sexual or pan-sexual could take...they know they're not straight so it starts as coming out as gay and then figuring out they may not solely fit in that category either.  Basically, everything seems to be a spectrum, I wanted to acknowledge the controversy but I also don't feel equipped to comment on it at all so take it with a grain of salt. 

I always love the author's writing style.  She creates real, interesting, authentic characters.  They're almost too real - I was very sad and worried as I read because Ramona needs to protect her own future and not get so caught up in her family.

A Few Quotes from the Book
"In sophomore chemistry, Mr. Culver told us the most important thing to take away from his class was that the world isn't made up of isolated incidents. Knowing the elements was important, but even more relevant was knowing how they changed when combined with others. And that's what I'm most terrified of right now - how Freddie and I will change when combined with others."

"It's not high school that I'll miss. It's my summer breaks. The two months of freedom that almost make me feel like a tourist in my own town. Next summer won't be any kind of break at all. It'll be life, and the kind of life I've got ahead of me doesn't include vacation time."

"I don't even know if we were in love, but we were happy, and...and happy is more than my parents ever had, if what they had was anything at all. It's sad that sometimes we let ourselves believe that if it's not bad, it must be good."